So as my title today may suggest,I am an over-controlling girlfriend.I won't go into detail because it's private and confidential but let's just say,today I Google-ed and it finally and really hit me that I am a control freak.
Some links I visited,take a read if you wish:
http://www.diserio.com/relationshipkillers.html (Controlling is listed as #1)
And I read some other articles too,this on titled 'You're a Shitty Girlfriend' (I know I am)
This last website is really good,with some sick humor but at the same time stating facts and how to improve yourself and the relationship you're in.
And in one of the articles,it stated that if one partner is a control freak(me),it will cause the other partner to be resistant.Resistant meaning to pull away,to be distant etc because the other partner is now the victim of being controlled.That's not what I want,that's not what anyone wants their partner to be.I'm no relationship guru but this is...common sense.So I realized that I really need to just get my sht together and maybe take some time off this whole thing,get some air,get some space to think.To think of my actions,what I will do to improve me,improve us to make sure it doesn't happen again.I'm tired of making the same mistakes without knowing why,and I'm sure people get tired of hearing apologies.Apologies mean that there shouldn't be a second time,that the same mistake shouldn't happen again.Why apologise if it happens over and over?It wouldn't be sincere then,yes?
Also,I've realized that I have some self-esteem/confidence and trust issues and I need to get that settled.I'm trying to let loose more,trust people in general too,and build my confidence.Nothing is worse than a girl who isn't confident.
Anyway,that's all I have to say for today.Goodnight.